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Friday, September 25, 2015

My personal Faith journey

I was thinking about faith and how when Jesus was here, how he healed people in villages until there was no sick person left in the village. I was thinking, what did they do to receive the healing that they received.  As I read about it I see that they didn't do anything.  It was the love and mercy of Jesus that healed them, it was nothing that they did. I remember one time quite a few years ago I was helping my husband move a very heavy stove up on the hearth that he had built for it and I had a sharp pain in my lower back and I went down and I was down for eleven days.  Could not walk, had to use crutches with someone beside me to steady me.  The injury was about 2 1/2 inches across and swollen and red.  I laid there for eleven days and on the eleventh day I decided that I was going to see what I had to do to receive healing from God.  I turned to Psalm 6 and read it over and over and prayed over it. (I was probably in my late forties)  Finally in desperation I just told God I was willing to be an invalid  the rest of my life if that is what it would take to save me.  It was OK with me.  I immediately had no pain and I sat up and I stood up and laid back down and my husband came in about that time and I said, I can sit up, I can stand up, will you please look at my back and see what the injury looks like and it was gone.  I was so overwhelmed I collapsed on the couch where I had been all those days and was so grateful and have been so grateful for that instant healing ever since.

Fast forward until now when I have broken every vertebrae twice and have had seven filled with cement to stop the pain, I have broken most of my ribs and a hip and have suffered ever so much through the years because of the pain.  Have asked God to heal me and I know he hears me, but I don't know why all the suffering.  I can still walk, believe it or not, it's painful but I walk with a cane or walker.  I also have a aorta valve which is closing up like my husbands did, I just had a pacemaker put in last week because my heart was stopping for up to 7 seconds at a time and was causing me to pass out or fainting and dizzy spells which could have ended up with me falling and getting a bad injury or breaking something.  Still after all this, I am asking God for healing, I am 84 years old, my mind is still clear and I want to be useful in His work of saving souls.  So here is my study on faith in my own words.  Please understand that I want with all my heart to be free of pain and able to walk again for exercise.  I can only walk a short way even with my cane or walker without pain in my back.

These verses are in my own words, I hope they will mean something to you as they do to me.

James 2:18  "I will show you my faith or what I believe by trusting You completely, nothing in the way."

Hebrews 4:2  "I must mix faith with Your word in order to profit by it.  So to increase my faith, I must spend time in Your word."

Hebrews 11: 6  "Without faith it is impossible to please Him."

Hebrews 10:38,39  "I must live by faith, and if I draw back, God will be very unhappy with me even though He still loves me.  He doesn't want me to draw away from Him."

Galatians 5:6  "Faith must work through love for Him and those who I meet each day."

Ephesians 3:17  "I pray that Christ may dwell in my heart through faith in Him."

2 Corinthians 5:7  "I must walk by faith, not by sight."

This has been quite a journey, I do not know what God's plans are for me but I do know that whatever they are, I am willing to be His child and if it means resting in the grave until He comes again, I am willing to do that because I know when I come forth, it will be in a completely new body and I will be with Him forever, in the mean time I will trust Him and His word and know that He can heal and will heal according to His promises, because His promises never fail.  It may be now and it may be when He returns, in any way I will be healed.  Thank you for reading my 'Faith Journey'. I hope that it has helped you in some way.   Grandma Joan

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